


trouble will come (trouble will go) [Recovery]

by dreamerfreak



Series: YOI Angst Week Ficlets [2]
Category: Yuri!!! on Ice (Anime)
Genre: Cuddling & Snuggling, M/M, Past Rape/Non-con, Protective Katsuki Yuuri, Recovery
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-10-15
Updated: 2020-10-15
Packaged: 2021-03-08 00:33:28
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Rape/Non-Con
Chapters: 1
Words: 986
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/26916664
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/dreamerfreak/pseuds/dreamerfreak
Summary: Victor is used to the nightmares. He doesn't like them, but he's used to them. But he's never had a nightmare like this one before.Promo Drabble for YOI Angst Week 2020 (December 7-13).
Relationships: Katsuki Yuuri/Victor Nikiforov
Series: YOI Angst Week Ficlets [2]
Series URL: https://archiveofourown.org/series/1954669
Comments: 14
Kudos: 50
Collections: YOI Angst Week 2020





	trouble will come (trouble will go) [Recovery]

**Author's Note:**

> Hello lovelies!
> 
> I wrote this little snippet as promo for YOI Angst Week 2020, for the Day 2 prompt Solitary/Recovery. You can find more information about Angst Week at [Twitter](https://twitter.com/yoiangstweek) and [Tumblr](https://yoiangstweek.tumblr.com/). Please mind the tags and stay safe.
> 
> Special thanks to the wonderful [Kathe](https://archiveofourown.org/users/mandolinearts/pseuds/katheneverwrites) who helped me brainstorm titles and introduced me to the amazing song that this title comes from: This Is Not the End by MILCK.

_He was being held down. There were too many hands. Hands on his waist, at his wrists, hands on his thighs and… Why were there so many hands?_

_Victor turned his head, trying to see, but everything was white and fuzzy. There was a man, he knew his name… Didn’t he? Someone important, but everything was a blur and Victor couldn’t make out his face. That was okay, he thought. He didn’t need to see._

_But there was a second man, and that was different. Wrong. No. He was holding Victor’s hand, lying beside him, and Victor tried to pull away. What was he doing here? He would get hurt, he would… just like… No. He shouldn’t be…_

_The man rolled toward Victor and he could see his face, unlike the_ other _man. He had dark hair and warm eyes but they looked cold so cold and his hands reached for Victor’s waist and no this wasn’t it wasn’t no not like this that wasn’t how it was supposed to no…_

Victor woke. He stared wide-eyed toward the ceiling but for long moments he didn’t see anything, didn’t hear anything except his own panting breath. Eventually other sounds filtered in. The hum of a car on the street outside. An appliance elsewhere in the apartment, clicking quietly before settling down. A huffing dream-whine from Makkachin at the end of the bed. The soft murmur of Yuuri’s breathing beside him, not quite a snore. He only snored when he had worked too hard, and Victor took care to make sure that didn’t happen anymore.

The calming rhythm broke with a huff and a mumbled “Vitya?” Victor was sure he hadn’t moved, hadn’t made a sound, but Yuuri snuggled closer, squinting in the dark without his glasses, and nuzzled up to Victor’s face.

Victor flinched away, a flash of cold eyes and twisted smile— _It didn’t happen, that didn’t happen, not like that, no_ —before he pushed it away and forced himself to relax. It was too late. Yuuri pulled back slightly, suddenly looking a lot more awake. “Vitya, what’s wrong? Did something… was it another nightmare?”

Victor hated that Yuuri even knew to ask. He squeezed his eyes shut and tried to ignore his first impulse to smile and say everything was fine, nothing was wrong. That mask didn’t work anymore, not on Yuuri. Victor had let his guard down too many times, and now Yuuri saw through him so easily.

Yuuri sat cross-legged on the bed and stared down at him, face mostly cloaked in shadow. But even with the shadows, Victor could feel the warmth of his gaze, unlike in the dream. “Talk to me, Vitya,” he prompted gently.

With a huff, Victor turned on his side and buried his face in Yuuri’s pillow. “Just a dream, like you said.” He reached for Yuuri’s hand blindly, then guided it to his own head, letting his warm fingers soothe his tension a little bit. Yuuri petted his hair and hummed.

“You usually like snuggles after one of those dreams,” he said eventually. Victor was grateful that he didn’t have to explain what kind of dream it was. He didn’t have them often, but he had experienced them enough since Yuuri had moved in that he didn’t have to drag out all the details anymore. That was what the therapy was for. But he was right, all the same. Victor usually threw himself at Yuuri after waking from one of his dreams, allowing the familiar, comforting touch of his love to wipe away the old memories.

“It was… different… this time,” he confessed softly, half muffled by the pillow.

“Mm?” Yuuri didn’t stop gently finger-combing his hair.

“It was…” Victor turned his face fully into the pillow for a minute, waiting until he almost felt like he would smother before he let himself come up for air. He didn’t want to tell this time. He had let Yuuri in so deep, let him know secrets that no one else did, and somehow, miraculously, Yuuri hadn’t pushed him away, hadn’t been disgusted by the dark spaces hidden under the shiny surface. But would that still be true if he told Yuuri… if he had dreamed that Yuuri… It wasn’t true, he would _never_ but…

Fingers brushing against his face surprised him. “Oh Vitya,” Yuuri whispered, then leaned away before returning with a handful of tissues. Victor accepted them and awkwardly swiped at his face, belatedly realizing that he was crying.

“Sorry, I’m sorry, I—”

“Hush, don’t worry about it.” Yuuri returned to petting his hair while Victor tried not to start full-on sobbing.

He swallowed a couple of times and tried desperately to choke down the lump in his throat. He had to get it out, he just had to get it _over with_. “You were… you were there and… I know, _I know_ you’d never hurt m— I _know_ … Yuuri, I’m sorry, I’m so sorry, I didn’t mean to, I—”

Somehow Yuuri was laying down, their noses practically touching, but Victor could barely see him through his tears and his squinched-up face, and he must look so _ugly_ right now, and—

Yuuri was saying something but Victor just shook his head and kept shaking his head and his chest felt so so tight. It hurt. _I’m sorry._

Hands stilled his head, held him in place, but it was so gentle and soft. “Listen. Listen, Vitya.”

Victor listened. His face was hot and his throat ached and his heart thrummed in his ears, but he listened.

“It’s not your fault,” he said, fierce suddenly in the quiet. “I won’t leave you.”

He didn’t try to stop the tears this time, but he shifted forward in tiny, painful movements, until he could press his face against Yuuri’s chest and sob. “Just stay with me. Please.”

“I’m still here,” he whispered, nuzzling soft, soft kisses into Victor’s hair. “Still here.”

**Author's Note:**

> Thanks for reading, and I hope you enjoyed (?). Be sure to check out the rest of the series for more deliciously angsty drabbles from the lovely [aceofjapan](https://archiveofourown.org/users/aceofjapan/pseuds/aceofjapan) and me.
> 
> I hope some of you decide to join us in December for Angst Week! Bring on the tears. 💖
> 
> If you like Victuuri and dragons, come hang out with me on [Twitter](https://twitter.com/lexical_dreamer)!


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